Monday 26 June 2006: The Biopsy

So it turns out that STAT doesn't mean squat in our medical system. It took over 5 days to get a "stand-by" appointment to maybe, perhaps, most likely but definitely not for sure get a huge needle inserted in my booby.

I got to the Palo Alto Medical Foundation at 7:30 am. Dutifully, like a good Googler in the middle of mid-year performance reviews I brought my laptop with me (Mary, I hope you are reading this part) and proceeded to gush over my collegues excellent performance over the last two quarters as I waited in a tiny room wearing scrubs. The nurses where very impressed by my set up: computer, headphones, ipod, phone and stylish water bottle. They were tempted to check email, I know it!

At around 11 they finally got around to me. I was lead to a room where they did a mamogram...not as painful as I thought, but it definitely feels funny to have a strange lady place your breast on a plate so it can be smooched nearly to death. Once they realized that yes, the lump was indeed not a figment of my imagination, we proceeded to the sonogram.

One of the interesting things about the sonogram (in addition to the warming gel...hmmm warming gel) is the cool imaging that allows you to see blood flow. My tumor actually was quite active in this department. Lots of blood flow, rivers of it--relatively speaking. I didn't realize that this was bad news--too busy looking at the screen like the computer geek I can be--until the radiologist came in and the tech said in a overly somber tone:"It has blood flow, look!" The radiologist's expression sank, she took my hand and asked me if she could please insert a ginormous needle in my boob. Now, I have been propositioned before, but this was too good to pass up. Dark room, scrubs, the dim light of the tumor's blood flow on the screen..."Let's do it!" I replied.

She was kind and got the procedure underway very quickly. She winced again when I told her I felt no pain as she scraped the top of the tumor in several directions to get multiple samples. I guess this is a bad sign. She reamined calm and assured my doctor would have the results within 3 days.